Reports are surfacing that there is a large threat of malware via Twitter. Two new trending topics lead unsuspecting users to what they think are pornographic videos. Instead the user is prompted to install the latest version of Flash, which is actually the malware installer.
Security experts suggest that Twitterers who fall prey to this are simply “doing the internet porn thing all wrong.”
Jim Jacobson, an Internet security consultant whose clients include numerous Fortune 500 companies says, “Twitter is the wrong tool for finding hot, sexy videos of lowlife individuals committing scandalous acts of carnality.” He then took a puff of his cigarette and looked around to see who in line at the coffee shop was noticing that he was being interviewed.
“There are so many better ways to find the disgusting video of your choosing,” he continues. “Twitter works better for social unrest in Arabic countries than it does for the delivery of porn.”
Jacobson offers the following tips for finding good, malware-free porn on the Internet:
1. Google is your friend – Google keeps track of malware threats for you, so you can watch your videos with no fears;
2. If you see any “crotch flash” links mentioning any celebrity who’s not Britney Spears, chances are it’s not real;
3. That 18 year-old aerobics instructor / cheerleader who just sent you a Facebook friend request? She didn’t really “stumble onto your profile and thought you were real cute.”
Thankfully, the 
Like every other loser who doesn’t have a life, I stayed up late on Friday night to make sure I could grab “Mockaholic” as my Facebook vanity URL. So, if you want to be my friend, now all you have to do is go to 
I’m still checking my sources for confirmation, but the rumor on the street is that there is going to be a switch from analog TV transmissions to digital tomorrow. If this is true, it could mean real trouble for millions of Americans.