Thankfully, the Twitpocalypse passed with only a few developer outages. And those were probably caused by techs who drank too much cheap booze at lunch. I’ve spent a lot of time in the IT departments of Fortune 500 companies, and let me tell you: They’ve got a LOT of booze stashed away among all those computer parts.

Why do you think they keep their doors locked? Are they afraid someone might steal the POS corporate-grade Dell doorstops laptops they’re working on? No, they’re afraid everyone will find out they spend all day doing nothing but drinking and looking at Japanese porn.

Where was I? Oh, yeah. The Twitpocalypse.

Apparently life is now safe for Twitter fanatics. You can all come out of your bomb shelters and put your rifles away. Just like Y2K, this vision of the apocalyptic came and went with nary an effect on your poor, pathetic life.

But who knows what tomorrow might bring? Maybe the Newtpocalypse?

-J